My mother regularly tells me that the North East is a waste of time because, I quote, “all of them are as thick as two planks of wood” unquote
I smile falsely in response, cross my fingers behind my back and reply ‘Actually, I have met some intelligent people up here.’
My mother spent months telling me that I should move to the North East because it was an ‘up and coming place’.
Originally I scoffed and said ‘Why on earth would you want to live in a place full of smoking chimney stacks and mine shafts?’
Now my mother takes every opportunity to beg me to move back down to the south, she even insists on taking me on a guilt trip by placing my eighteen month old brother on the phone and trying to force him to tell me how much he misses me and that I should come home.
My brother is still trying to master the word ‘Hello’ and our mum is already teaching him to follow a path of emotional blackmail.
Ah well, it will be me choosing her care home one day…
Is that in London?
I have found in my experience that some peoples geography is very poor, many of the Northerners I have met seem to think that the whole of the South is in London and cannot comprehend that it is made up of different counties, mind you, these could be the same people that perhaps live in Gateshead and would have trouble locating Durham.
An amusing story that I must mention is one told to me by my partner who is a special constable. When called to an incident on an estate in Gateshead, a girl said to him ‘You aren’t Northern, where are you from?’
My partner asked in response ‘Do you ever watch Eastenders?’
To which the girl replied ‘I’ve never seen you on Eastenders.’
If I ever tell someone here that I am from Surrey again and they reply ‘No need to apologise’ I must not be held accountable for my actions.
There are differences between the North and South, the humour, conversation, words they use, cars they drive. I am sure that the top story on the news is always who has won the Football whereas in the South it will be that someone has been murdered.
The South seems to be more dry humoured and ambitious, the Northerners believe that Southerners are rude, busy people always on the go that discuss subjects such as politics, there is even a myth here that supermarkets in the South are more expensive.
The Northerners are completely unreserved about saying ‘You aren’t from up here, are you from London?’
I could not imagine approaching a Northerner in the South and saying ‘You aren’t from round here…’
